My Name is Keefe        Play

If only I knew then what I know now

I cannot remember exactly what it was that prompted me to investigate further into Keith's behaviour when I did. I thought he may have been a narcissist, not that I had any real working knowledge of what that meant, but I did know he was raving misogynist and I was concerned about his behaviour, so I typed in narcissism and misogyny into the search engine and see what come up. 

There was an avalanche of information that appeared to confirm Keith's narcissism, and it was now a matter of searching for an evaluation that most represented the behaviour that had been observed with Keith and present it to Rachael for her to make of it what she would. No doubt there is a myriad of reasons why this doing this would be frowned upon by professionals, but as they only seemed to exist on the web, I fumbled and stumbled along the best I could.

The following day Rachael came to visit and I showed her what I had found. She read it for a few minutes and then said: “That’s Keith, I cannot deny it.”

I remember feeling rotten guilty because I was shattering an illusion that she wanted so much to be real, while at the same time feeling some relief, as she now saw what I did, and maybe Keith’s hold on her could be broken. I don’t recall anything more of that day and of what else was said on the matter, though I suspect very little and it was now a matter of wait and see what was to happen next.

I rang Rach the next morning about 10 am to see how she was feeling and Keith answered saying she was still in bed and to try back later. This didn’t surprise me, I thought she was likely feeling down and not motivated to get up.  It was about 2.00pm when the phone rang, and it was Keith letting me know that Rachael was still in bed. Keith ringing to be considerate, something didn’t seem right, but I didn’t dwell on it, until 4.00pm when he again rang to inform me that Rachael was still sleeping, that set the alarm bells ringing, and I jumped in the car headed for Rachael’s tout suite.

When I arrived at Rachael’s Keith was sitting on the couch with his friend Paul and Rachael was still lying in bed, nothing seemed to be amiss. I went into see Rachael and cuddled up with her; she was awake but obviously feeling dejected and depressed about her relationship with Keith. I got up to get her a drink of water and as I headed into the kitchen Keith had just left to drive his friend to the bus stop, and it was then I noticed Rachael’s notebook open on the coffee table and read what she had written there. It was a brief suicide note saying that she just could not go on any longer, that included a list of the beneficiaries of her assets, and dear old Keith her loving fiancée, had been bequeathed her unit.

I then asked Rachael had she attempted and overdose on something, and she told me she had taken nine Seroquel the night before. Seroquel is an antipsychotic that is prescribed to aid sleep as it causes severe drowsiness. Nine tablets is not a lethal dose and she was in no danger now, having taken them the night before, however, I rang triage at the Royal Melbourne just to make certain there was nothing else I had to be concerned about.

It was a scream for help from my poor sweetheart, rather than a suicide attempt, but Mr Grubby didn’t know that and he was waiting for her to die to claim HIS property and that is why he rang me not to come over, he didn’t want me interfering and saving her life unnecessarily.  My blood wasn’t half boiling, that’s it, just wait until that scumbag returns; he’ll be out of here before he knows what hit him. The second he came through the door I said, “I know what you are up to you slimy piece of shit, you are out of here, “He then screams out at the top of his voice, “Rachael, Rachael, tell him to get out of my house, tell him to get out of my house!” “Your house!” I saw ten shades of red and belted him, while he kept screaming at Rachael, demanding that she should tell me to leave.

I then saw Rachael had collapsed in the middle of the floor and he was still screaming at her, until she said, “David please go.” He was mentally torturing her and if I stayed it would be worse for her and I didn’t what else to do but leave. As I backed down the driveway Rachael was now collapsed on the grass and Keith was behind her, hovering, holding her with a filthy sadistic grin on his face “this belongs to me, she’s mine to do with as I please.” I felt as though I was looking into the pit of hell, through the eyes of Satan himself.

"Keith's bullying put Rachael in a state of dissociation that is depicted in this poem and that constitutes psychological torture."

Death Wish

I didn't know what to do, as long as Rachael was under his control, she would say and do whatever he told her to, and the last time I reported a similar instance to police I was told to go away, as the person I was concerned about was an adult and capable of making their own decisions. I knew nothing about domestic violence, and what could be done about it. I told family members of my concern for Rachael but go no help there. It didn't enter my mind that Keith was capable of seriously hurting Rachael or worse for a second, he was a slightly built cowardly Wiesel of a man, I was concerned that the minute she understood Keith didn't love her that it may trigger a suicide attempt.

Attacking Keith as I did that day, in the assumption that Rachael must now see the toxic predator he is and want him gone, was a mistake of catastrophic proportions. I should have said nothing at all, and stayed close to both my enemy and my friend. While I do not blame myself for Rachael's death because I really did not understand what I was dealing with, had I kept my head and stayed quiet, I have no reason not to think that Rachael would still be alive today, and that is something that is not easy to live with.

If only I knew then what I know now.

The Victorian code of practice for the investigation of family violence

Upholding the law

A week had passed since the incident at Rachael's and I hadn't heard a word from her, so I decided to go to her place and see if I could speak with her. Upon knocking on the front door when I arrived, Keith started screaming at the top of  his voice, like the big coward that he is, "I am calling the police" and "Rachael tell him to go." I could see Rachael standing near the door through the adjacent pane of glass and when Keith started screaming at her she collapsed against the glass whereupon I could see that her big blue eyes were dilated and that she was severely stressed and so I left.

I had been driving for only a few minutes when I received a phone call from Senior Constable Matthew Harris from the Mill Park Police about a complaint from a Mr Keith B. The complaint was that I had broken a restraining order that he had put in place. I said that is the first I have heard of it, but I welcome the opportunity to have the complaint heard in court. He asked why I had attended Mrs Keogh's residence and I told him I was concerned for her well being as I believe Keith B is no good parasite that is taking advantage of her. He then attempted to insinuate that what I had just told him somehow proved I knew about the restraining order. Once again I said, I don't know anything about an intervention order but am happy to have the matter settled in court, I am only concerned about the safety of my friend can't you understand that? He then blew a fuse, and in a raised voice told me, "Keith B is looking after Rachael and if you break the intervention order again I will have you arrested." I was already frustrated by this time and said to him "he is not looking after her you fucking idiot, he is a manipulative liar and has sucked you in." He started yelling threatening arrest again, and I just said "I heard you the first time if there is nothing else I am going" and that was it.

The following is the procedure police must follow in responding to reports of family violence, as per the Code of practice for the investigation of family violence(1) that Sen Con Matthew Harris saw fit to ignore. Sen Con Harris was a nominee at "The inaugural Excellence in Policing Family Violence Awards" held in Bendigo in 2005 and was fully aware of his duties and responsibilities under the relebvant act.(2)

(note that AFM = aggrieved family member)

Click on photo to enlarge

Click on photo to enlarge

I was at a loss as to what to do, and it's only in hindsight I now know I had options available, including the police for one and the myriad domestic violence organisations that exist. But I still didn't know that I was dealing with what was understood as a case of domestic violence and I also did not yet understand that Keith B. was more than a narcissist, something that I was only beginning to understand the implications of, but that he was a desperate, unhinged paranoid psychopath and an unknown quantity that did represent an immediate danger to Rachael.

I did have cause to speak to Keith’s father one time on the telephone and he readily told me that his son was a pathological trouble maker who had multiple death threats made against him. His father had no time for him at all, and I suspect he was also a narcissist from his cold indifference about anything pertaining to Keith and from what Keith himself had said about his family life. Rach and I were aware that Keith had enemies as he was paranoid about security. There were window locks on all the windows that were secured at all times bar one, and the security doors were to be kept locked at all times, especially when he was home.

They killed my darling girl  Play

I was certain Rachael would eventually see what he was and make contact, the worry was would he drive her to self-harm first. Rachael did have a facebook page, so I could get some idea of how she was and I did write to her via email and the available message option on facebook, while I had no way of knowing what her current attitude towards me was. If she was splitting then she would see me as someone hostile and could report my messages to police, as I was contravening the intervention order in writing her.